Well, here it is – December 15th, 2016. This year has been so many things, but most of all it’s been about family.
Little man went home with mommy yesterday, full time (if you’re wondering what that’s about, read my previous post from August). We’re so excited that this little family is back on their feet and doing well! I had a few sad moments this week, I’ll totally admit that – but because we will still see him often, and will still get to spoil him as Auntie and Uncle, we’re doing pretty good overall.
When we knew that little man was going home soon, we connected with our adoption social worker, and picked up the process where we left off – so here I am again, once again blogging about our adoption journey! That’s a pretty cool way to end off the year, considering the news I have to share!
So… let’s back up a bit. Over the last 6 months, we have kept in touch with our social worker to let her know how things have been going. I attended two events in town related to adoption and teenage adoption, and when we knew that little man would be going home soon, our social worker continued with the process of looking for a good match for our family.
Turns out that one of the boys we were interested in earlier this year is still needing permanence! Our social worker made some inquiries, and we’re moving forward in the process with this young man. What’s really cool is that his foster family is actively involved in his life, and they will be involved in the adoption as well – the more family members this young man has in his life, the better! They (the foster parents and Ministry team) have taken a look at our profile book that we put together, and they saw things that made them think we might be a good match (in particular, our love of hockey and the outdoors, our Christian home). We also received some paperwork to go over, and we also like what we read and hear about this young man.
That means that we are taking the next step. All adoptions are different, and in our case that means that we will have a conversation with the Ministry team (this young man’s social workers) and the foster parents. This will most likely happen in mid-January. Following that meeting, we will all go away and give the matter some serious thought… and then if all agree, we could move to the formal proposal stage.
For those that don’t know, the formal proposal stage is when you stop considering other matches, and put your attention and focus on this one child/children. Proposals can take months before they come through. They are quite detailed, and include everything that the Ministry knows about the child. Sometimes further assessments need to be done. It all depends on the child.
Realistically, if everything works out with this particular child, we might be meeting them late Spring, and transitioning over the Summer, maybe moving in for Fall. It’s not a quick process. It could be sooner than that, or longer – and that’s totally ok. Things need to move at the speed which best suits the child – and of course, being parents, we want what is best for them!
This is a pretty cool way to head into the holidays! Last year, we were going through the crazy of the home study process, with rescheduling and shifting of social workers. We’ve come so far in the last year, and so much has happened, it really does boggle my mind. But what I am most thankful for are the things I’ve learned. I’ve learned that when things get really stressful, I need to focus on good self-care. There were times that Jean would ask me when I ate last, and I couldn’t remember – yikes! I need to go easier on my expectations of myself – as much as I would love to be, I am not Superwoman (ugh, you should have seen our house some days!). And I’ve learned how a foster parents feels about many things. I will definitely be able to better understand and appreciate the sacrifices that foster parents make, and how they will feel when our future child leaves their home. This knowledge will be so valuable moving forwards!
Our lives don’t often take the paths that we expect them to, but I’ve learned what it’s like to live in the moment and take each day as it comes. There is peace in that! So over the Holidays, enjoy each little moment. I know I will! And here comes 2017!!!